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Taking Out the Body’s Trash

Part of my recovery process includes eliminating distractions so my body can focus on repair. It may sound wacky, but I discovered that keeping my digestive tract in great shape helps redirect attention where it is needed most. This offbeat obsession drove me to invent an unconventional toilet that I hold a patent for, The Courtesy 180. (Courtesy 180)


The idea came to me while traveling through Indonesia and after much research, the evidence pointed to the effectiveness of squatting to get the deed done. Yet, despite all the data, the modern toilet has not evolved in any material way.


Sure, it is a gross topic, but want to know what is even more disgusting? The average person walks around with five to ten pounds of shit in their body. Now that is just plain nasty and debilitating. People are basically carrying a bag of garbage around that slows them physically, mentally, and emotionally, but no one likes to talk about it. This natural human process is unavoidable and needs to be discussed without shame or embarrassment.


When I dabbled in this space during my first marriage, we decided on a fun and rather pricy vacation to perform an extended cleanse at the We Care Spa in Desert Hot Springs. For a week, I subsisted on green juices while receiving daily colonics and occasional massages to distract myself from the prolonged hunger pains. From my perspective, I saw this place as a bit of an absurdity because I paid top dollar to starve myself and get flushed out, all in the most austere space imaginable. Oh, and to top it off, no electronics. Sounds like fun, huh?


By day four, my wife had enough, and we packed up to head home from our “vacation.” We were like badgers on a night raid as the full-on sugar withdrawals compelled us to action. So, as good junkies, we found the closest grocery store and downed a whole box of cookies along with a large bag of M&Ms as we jammed to tunes on the drive back home. It felt good for about an hour. It was the worst decision after making an investment in our health . . . live and learn.


These days, I am more methodical in my approach. I perform a five-day cleanse, a.k.a. exorcism, three times a year using a formula perfected by Dr. Schulze's. I also get colonics every three months and throw in an occasional home enema for good measure. I do all this because removing the body's trash makes me feel amazing. After this ordeal, my body shows gratitude through clearer vision, stronger taste buds, and boundless energy. Back to the car analogy, this is the body one gets for life and changing the oil regularly leads to better performance.


More on this topic and others in my forthcoming memoir, Aggressively Human, to be released on all platforms in November 2023.

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